pretending t be;

im at home tha whole freaking day.
awww.
so hell boreddd.
suppose t go t dez's house la.
hurr!
(((x

AH! 2 more days t ma birthdayy!:DD






just give it up andd let me lurve yoo.

i've always wanted t look at tha bright sidee.

ma hands feel so cold.
im dying soon.



backk frm town agn.
was out withh millie!
finally can see herr laa.
pigg:DD


long john.
taka.
millie bought smth ferr her godma.:DD
den t far east.
yeapp.
den cat called.
so we went baq t cine.
andd chilled out there.
yaa.
andd tht's it la.
boredddddd.






i wonder,
if yoo everr think of mee.

ilu, mum andd dad.

back frm dinner.
heh.
daddy and mummy were putting a fake smile infront of mey jus now.
they jus wanted mey t b happy.
thanksss. ilu,both. mwakmwakk. :DD
were having so muchh fun jus now.
thanks daddy.mummy.emily. ferr celebrating ma birthdayy earlierr.








dont tell me wadd u dont mean t do.

andd so waddd?

i miss yoo millie.
heh.












im childish. so wad?
im thinking too much. and so?
yoo hate me so i hate yoo backk.
YOO make me dont have tha mood t go out with ma family t celebrate ma birthday.
so wad?
got a scolding from 'em. so wadd?
im alone at home. so?
thanks isaac. :DD

do i feel special? :DD

woke up from a nightmaree.
eeeeeee.
bt it's worth it.:DD
hahaaa.
i saw one big present on ma table.:DD
big box.
andd when i opened it,
there's another green box,
red box,
another smaller red box,
anotherr lil box.
heh.
it was a white mask perfume.:DD
thanks SISTERRR!
hahaaa.
so cutee ryte!


okayy.
we town'd.
dez.cat.lionel and meeyy.
cat n lionel went t clementi 1st.
while we went t yoshi.
YUM YUM.
den t heeren.
far east.
baq t cine.
heeren agn.
lols.
graffiti cafe.
saw smth which i dont expected t be seen!
hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
BAHH.
andd dez went t meet her friend la.
nehh nehh.
went hommeee with cat la.
mwakk peeps.

i didnt notice tht.

RAINING!
:DD


met up with manda at simei mrt with kaku n cat.
shell came laterr.
heh. she took an umbrella.
lols. so cuteee.
eh well ,
afterr buying tht stupid books,
went overr t tampines mall.
lols.
it's raining and we were carrying tht heavy books.
ARSE!
*shell , hold eur umbrella properlyy.*
lols. so cuteeeee. :DD
den yoshi. lotsa craps.
lols. den shell left.
went up t look ferr smth. errr. ferged it.
i forgot wads tht called.
manda needs t get smth ferr her bf one laa.
lols.
hmmm. i saw TOOT TOOT train.
lolss.
den t where er used t sit and gossip!
*eVIL LAUGH* buahahaha!
hiakhiakk.
went hm. andd came out.
towned.
met dez n her friend. she told me she's alone.
nehh nehh.
yawnnn.
so hell boreddd.
tht's all la.
oh ya. we went t graffiti cafe.
eh. pearlynn was there:))
andddddd home bitter home. :DD
got a scolding by dez.)))):

BON VOYAGE! :DD imu*

awwwwwwwwww.
this is the last tym im gonna chat with herr.
sobbsobb.
come baq asap aiight?
im gonna miss eu fuckloads.
haiii.
not in the mood now.
thanks ferr everything , sweets. :DD
i'll miss eu badly.

nightmares started.

im baq home!
wwwooo.
ma com screen is getting worst.
lols.
umm.
well, met ma gurls arnd 5+.
yupp.
ohh. lionel was there.
andd yaa.
met melvin at cine.
ate kfc.
saw gab, vernon.
went up t k pool.
andd t rocky.
not long after , gab n co came.
matt n natt.
hahaa.
tht rocky manager accused them.
wadd they spit on da floor.
the guards were lyk chasing us awayy.
hey cmon' im innocent mann!
aarrgghhh!


millie n kaku left.
left me.cat.lionel.
okayy. got t kno tht sickening isaac.
hahaa.
he's funny.
met herr. :DD
up t pool agn.
we spent lyk only awhile tonight. :((
SO SAD! IM SO HELL SAD!
she gave ma a ROXY KEY CHAIN!
omg. lurve it so hell muchh.
hahaa. thanks , sweets. :DD
we took last train homeee.
andd im gonna miss her now.
lols.
tht's alllllllll.


history is a lie.

actually...

HELLO!
im so happy since ytd.
hahaa.
yaa.
went out with cat t meet herr ytd.
andd lionel camee.
no shutter in cine!
so went overr t lido.
7.30-full.
cat couldnt make it.
so i watched with her.
:DD
saw sean.
he's watching too.:))
saw gab, vernon n guys.
gab wished me happy birthdayy.
still quite early cann.
bt anyways, thanks la.:DD
ate long john.


headed t far east with her.
while cat n lionel went back.
we played pool.
OMG!
she's so good at it.
awww.
we took pics!
hahaaa. spastic us.
she gave me a birthdayy present.
lols!
THANKS, SWEETIE!!
den we went baq t lido.
saw dez.
okayy.
show started.
she kept pulling ma hands down when it's e scary part.!
lols.
went back t cine after tht.
pooled laa.
so funny cann!
hmm.coffee club.
lols.
lotsa stuffs t chat abt.:D
took cab homeeeee.
raining cats n dogs.
lols.
*ZZZZZZZZZOooooooooMmmmmmmmmmmmmm~*


actually, im just pretending.
actually, i dont wanna eu t do tht.
actually, i dont mean wadd i said.
actually, i hurt deep inside.
actually, im a wearing mask.

hating eu is foreverrrr. :DD

:DD
awwwwwwww....
it's raininggg!
off t get ready t town.
:)))))))))))
yawnn.
im so hell tireddd.
aiyaa. blog laterrr!
ehhh , i hate eu ahh.
lols.

locked alone in tha darkk.

*get things right before u start eu own rumours.eu should take into consideration of who eu trust. and right, mind eur own business.


yawnnn.
talking t lil millie now.
hahaa.
not working anymore.
i quit.
lols.
so tirring.
okayy la.
im hell boreddddd!
arghh!
:LET'S BE PROUD OF OURSELVES!
YAY MILLIE! :DD


i understand why eu had t leave
but i dont understand why eu're not coming backk.

u're e missing piece im searching ferr.

online since 3+.
luckily rika came online.
hahaaa.
funny sial.
so fun somemoree.
i miss her badlyyyy.)):
hmmm.
met dez arnd 9+.
she's so sincere laaa.
just t sayy sorry.
hahaa.
so nice of euu.
ehhh.
met cat.
mac.
lionel came.
den slack ferr awhile.
andd dez went home .
andd im here now.((:
nott raining. :((


i knew i lurved eu before i met eu.

i dont wanna be.

daddy sent sisterr t workk.
ma grandpa's anniversary.
so went with cousins.
aunt pauline drove me t cine.
heh.
thanks((:
waited ferr ma gurls lyk so hell long.
lols.
was msging rika.
:DD
she's so funny and cutee.
hahaa.


den t yoshi.
wanted t went overr far east t look fer herr.
bt she's heading t taka.
)):


bought maself a .... handband or smth.
lols.
i lurve tht shop.((:
back t cine.
OMG!
barcode cameeee.
|||||||||||||||||| *tit tit tit ... priceless.
yawnn*
eeee. he sucks.
lols.
dez camee.
saw nat n matt.
chatted with matt.
hahaa.
he's funny.
sent tht hyper-active gurl homee.
lolss.
den :DD home sweet homeeeee.


i dont wanna say.
i dont wanna talk.
i dont wanna speak.
i dont wanna hear.
i dont wanna listen.
i dont wanna kno.
i dont wanna answer.
i dont wanna reply.
i dont wanna feel.
i dont wanna kiss.
i dont wanna hold.
i dont wanna care.
i dont wanna bother.
i dont wanna live.
i dont wanna leave.
i dont wanna lost.
i dont wanna go.
i dont wanna wait.
i dont wanna cry.
i dont wanna angry.
i dont wanna laugh.
i dont wanna happy.
i dont wanna be lonely.

it's getting different andd different.

moodswinging heavily.


towned with kaku.dez.cat.
wanted t catch a movie la.
terrible cramp.
till now cann?!
SUCKS!
spoiled ma dayy.
well,
food court,
far east,
cine,
I SAW MANDA!
tht blue rose.
lols.
heeren,
graffiti cafe,
dez left,
DRAW DRAW DRAW ma anger off.
OLINDA's out man.
awww.
syl's safe.((:
group of guys sitting beside us.
lyk so damn funny cann?
heh.
home sweet home with kaku,
while cat's off t kallang.
this gurl here kept starring.
okay la.
SHOOOO!


how i wish,
i have the chance t choose,
wadd i really want in ma life.
and tht's t be with eu.

cherish me. cherish eu.

im so boredd.
bunny's out.
cat's out.
kaku's out.
millie's home.
im hereee.
yawnnnnnnnnn.
yay.
gng town tmr:D
umm.



if everyy dream i have is of eu;
i would wantt t sleep foreverr.

knock knock ! anybodayy home?

listening t samantha-lately overr n overr againn.
hahaa.
amanda sent me.((:
thanks girl.


tht bunny went outt.
yawnn.
so boredd.
din go ferr wrk todayy.
heh.
awww.
blog laterr.

a heartt tht once was broken,can now finally mend.a person once alone in life,can now call eu a friendd.

ma eyes swollen.
headchae is getting worst.
i didnt slept well last night i guess.


set off at 12noon with mummy andd cat.
heh.
saw shah on the train.
pretending not t kno.
lols.
umm.
IM IN LURVE WITH HERRR!
lols.
awww.
she told everyone im her lil princess!
i lurve eu so muchh!
hahaaa.
yeaa.
ma sweet sweet candyy. :DD


off t meet millie n kwakuu.
yoshi.
cheers.
den , I HATE PEOPLE T SHOUT AT ME!
tht gurl us an evil smile. heh.
tht's totally sucks , bitchh.
saw HUILING!!!! hahaaa. aiyooo. so cuteeeeeeeeee.
andd some other schoolmates.((:
andd andd andd.
whatshername.
lols.


bought maself a skirt.((:
hmmm. cat went off .
decided t leavee too since its only the 3of us.
yaa. kwaku n millie went t cine i think.
yeapps.
MISSEU! BAHH!


the nightmares are scaring me.
i wanna wake up.
right now.

the tears fall slowly down ma cheek.

IM LYK DEAD BEAT!
work work work.
blehh.
blister all overr ma handd.
aww.
bodyache.
anyone?
massage?
for me?
((:
stupided trolley so heavy.
-bites-
andd only earned that lil moneyy.
go rob the bank ahh.
lols.
okayy.
patrick is nice.
((:


letting go doesnt mean giving up
but accepting tht there are things tht cannot be.

why is this feeling inside mee?

sometimes i wish,
i could be near eu evenn ferrr a moment.
but eu dont want me heree.
knowing that i've lostt eu.
on the outside,
i'm smiling,
pretending i've forgotten eu.

lurve eu is lyk reaching for a starr.

i knew i lurve eu before i knew eu.
there are so many things that i would like t say t eu,
but i dont know how.


we dont mean t hurt the ones we love but eventually we always do.


A boy loved this girl. The girl didn't mind; she didn't care. Then the boy got real sick and was about to die. So the girl went up to him and asked, "Why are you leaving me?" ANd then the boy took her hand, and with his last breath said, "So I can be your angel, and get to love you forever." (awwwwwwwww):((

i love ice creammm.xD

this is another blog of mine.
lols!
sry.
kept changing.
lols.
i kno this skin is lame.
so i took it.
lols.
hawhaw.
millie came overr here just now.
buahahaa.
dez called me before she comes.
yaaa.
errrrrrrrrrr.
she kept messing up ma hair.
we ate ice cream!
hahaaa!
had dinner here.
um.
yaa. that's all.
((:


forgiving is not forgetting,
it is just letting go of the hurt.

sucks.

went ferr a swim i tha morning with cat.
cabbed t town.
lunched.
slacked.
cheers.
went home ALONE.
okayy.
so sad rightt?
um.
but im laughing lyk hell now.
millie looks so retardd!
bahaa!
oopss. x))
that's all ferr todayy.
so sadd.


forgive and forget makes u feel better. rightt?
i'll forgive but i cant promise i'll forget. ;/

yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

im baq home.
always the same old sentence.
lols.
err.
yaa.
went out.
towned.
err.
yoshi.
met cat.
i was with millie.
so.
slack at rocky.
took lotsa photos.
lols.
heeren.
cat andd her hubby took neos.
im lyk hell tired.
lols.
so i went back home with millie!
yawnn*


the feeling just sucks!

BURPS!

ton last night.
coffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee club rocks cann?
omg.
the food is lyk so niceeeee. *yummy.
bahaaa.

i guess everyone of them is still sleeping and im alr awake.
lols.
gng town later i guess.
yaa.
i'll blog again tonightt!((:
lurve ya peeps.


things aint the same.




is this a dream?
am i gng t wake up from this dream?

sobb.

i guess,
i wanna take back ma words.
things aint getting right.
i hatee thatt.
i dont want just cos of this ,
made me cried everynight.
made me throw temper.
made me hate eu.
im so disappointed.
and i swear.
t ma god.
from now ,
i wont think of thatt thing anymore.
ma girls are right.
i will only get maself hurt.
i've waited and waited.
i want t get this overr.

..

im baq home.
im beat.
the job was tough.
just training.
kena bitten by a BIG FAt mosquito.
it's swollen now.)):
well,ate dinner with cat at LJS.
den t TM.
wow.changes alot.
bought maself a pair of earings.
i've always aimed ferr.
;/
didnt touch ma phone the whole dayy.
feel so .. so weird?
nahh. ferged itt.
um. that's it.
stupid sisterr!
she gave a body lotion with glitterrrr!!!!!
aww. i hate thatt!
humphh! im gonna kill her ferr that.


i kno eu are hurting,
now all i ask is ferr a chance,
a chance that will prove this all wrong.
t prove thatt i lurve eu.
can i?

i hate wishes!

i remembered the wish which i have wished for,
i guess it's not coming true.
and i swear,
im not gonna have any wish again.

...

well, i hate fuckers.

i smell bullshit.

that moment when eu held ma hand,
when eu captured me with eur eyes.
when u said smth so sweet,
i never knew eur lurve andd words were all just lies.

)):

suppose t go ferr training todayy.
nahh.
dont have the mood.
can anyone nice t cheer me up?
;/
im down.


when eu feel lyk chewing smth,
im just lyk a chewy gum t eu.
and soon , eu'll find it tasteless.
and eu'll spit it out on the floor.
im sucha fool.
t think that i lurved eu
and that maybe eu could lurve me in return.
eu took ma heartt.
eu were a thief.
eu made me lurve eu.
i was so wrong.
a truth that was broken.
lies,
but t eu it's just so simple.
the tears that i so freely spilt.
the pain,
the loneliness.
every night ,
i will always sleep with ma tears.
that slowly flows down ma bed.

alallalaa

okayy!
this morning i woke up,
the first hell thing is NO ELECTRICITY!
i need t charge ma LOW BATT'D PHONE.
NO HEATER. NO AIR CON.NO MUSIC.NO FAN.
ARRGHHH!!
cat came over ma house and she's sweating all overr.
lols.


um. town'd.
met lionel followed by dez in town.
headed t far east.
without lionel.
((:


cat got a new haircut.
no diff cann?
and it's 24dollars.
awww.
it's lyk throwing moneyy.
lols.
um.
yaa.
den went back t cine.
LJS.cheers.
our that place.((:
dez sent me home.
ma parents saw.
okayy.
they kept asking about dez.
PLS! weird plus funny questions.
LOLS!
aighht.((:
ohh! and yaa. i saw 3stars in a row in the sky!
and i made a wishh! BAHHAAAA!


sometimes,the person eu really need is the person eu never really wanted.

:))

time t blog!((:
stayed at home the wholeeee dayy.
installed that cd drive can turn me madd.
lols.


i watched "THE BEST BET" alone at home.
how lonelyy.
awww.
that's all i guess.
and im here.((:
BAHAA!


tears fall down ma cheeks.
but dont want anyone t know,
dont want anyone t see i'm weak.
so it's easier t let go,
it may not show when i am hurt.




cant feel nothing but hurt,
inside this lonelyy soul of mine,
andd tears roll down ma face as i think that they would never stop.

lalalalalaa. HOI!

im baq home.
blog again since i've nth t do. ((:


awwwwwwww.
rena's "section" at mac was fucking long.
almost quarrelled.
hokayy.
i've quitt.
got a new JOB!
bahaa.
got that freaking lil moneyy!
aahhh!!
lols.


met cat laterr.
um. went t yoshi.
oooooo!
MA DAD BOUGHT ME A DIG CAM!
tskk.
i am so happyy noww. ((:
he got me a flat tv and a dvd player ferr ma OWN room!
he's just too nice.
ilu, dad. *mwakkss . hehee.
he said that was ma birthdayy present.
woooo!
this is the biggest birthdayy present i got ferr ma WHOLE lifee.
hahahaaa.
really , ilu dad. ((:
lols.


met xiao ben.
was slacking under ma blockk.
um.
so boredd.
>o<


imisseumissuemisseumisseumisseumisseumisseumisseumisseu
spot the wrong word.
lols.
im just too boredd.

i hate todayy!

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
TODAYY IS NOT MA DAYY!
not at all!
it's aint raining.
shucks!


i'll be meeting rena later at tm with ma mum.
will be meeting cat later i guess.
IM ALONE AT HOME.
SO BOREDD!


everything is temporary.
nothing lasts forever.
the good times and happy moments ,
just like nature will fall away and disappear.

yawn yawn.

phoned with dez last midnight.
lols. till morning.
she got lotsa crapps.
somemore she's speaking chinese t me.
lols!


anyway ,went town with ma gurls todayy andd that "chinese speaking'd" dez.
lols.
she was trying t speak chinese thruout the dayy.
made me laugh the whole dayy.
lols.


caught "SHARK TALE"!
hahaa.
it's so hell funny.
was laughing ma arse off the sit. ((:
no la i didnt fall. :D
um. met dez's friend.
pool'd. ((:
took neos againn!
hahaaa.
um. afterr taking ,
dez went t meet her friend.
ya.


saw amanda. ((:
den t OUR place againn.
hahaaa.
was having so much funs there.
hahaa.
sent millie home. ((:
sat at void deckk.
home sweet home.
yawnn*




All you ladies pop that thing like this
Shake your body, don't stop, don't quit
All you ladies pop that thing like this
Shake your body, don't stop, don't quit
Just do it, do it, do it, do it, do it now


Lick this, just like you should
Right now, Lick it good
Lick this just like you should
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that


My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that


First you gotta put your neck into it
Ah, don't stop, just do, do it
Then you roll your tongue, from the back up to the front
Then ya get it off, keep me up on ya
Make sure I keep my eyes on ya
All over the club and stuff
Real player show me so much love
The best love comes slow and long
Knows how to stay down on ya
All night 'till the crack of dawn
Real good, keep it comin' strong
Through the night, making so much love
In dead sleep when the sun comes up


So, lick it now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should
Right now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should


[Chorus]
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that


You might roll dutch, you might have G's
But so what player, get on your knees
A girl like me moans and screams
Thug misses know what I mean
At the club so fresh, so clean
Girls hatin' fellas watchin' me
Standin' out in the line, so clean
With a unit on my face, so mean
I gotta pick which fella I need
To take me out, spend his money on me
Try me I'll make you see
No other girl got nothin' me


So, lick it now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should
Right now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should


My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that


So, lick it now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should
Right now, lick it good
Lick this just like you should


My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that
My Neck, my back
Lick my ... just like that.

how do i live.

How do I,
Get through one night without you?
If I had to live without you,
What kind of life would that be?
Oh, I need....
I need you in my arms, need you to hold,
You're my world, my heart, my soul,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything good in my life,
And tell me now


How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?
Without you,
There'd be no sun in my sky,
There would be no love in my life,
There'd be no world left for me.
And I,
Baby I don't know what I would do,
I'd be lost if I lost you,
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything good in my life,
And tell me now,


How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?
Please tell me baby,
How do I go on?
If you ever leave,
Baby you would take away everything,
I need you with me,
Baby don't you know that you're everything,
Good in my life?
And tell me now,


How do I live without you,
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?
How do I live without you?
How do I live without you baby?

rain rain go awayy come again some other dayy.

im baq homee.
headache headachee!


rain so heavily this afternoon.
((:
went with dez.
hahaa.
both of us were stuck at somerset station.
heh.
went t hang ten ferr rent.
eu kno,
umbrella?


lols.


watched "PRINCESS DAIRIES"
it's nice!
catch it people. ((:
one idoitic guy sitting infront me wont stop moving his bloody head arnD!
*BISH BISH BISH!!*


afterr the show ,
we went t OUR place.
lols.


three ah lians kept starring at me.
@..@
duhh!
pok eur eyes!
lols.


i do not regret the things that i have done,
but those that i did not do.

i wannaaaaaaa go outttt.

just finished a lil bottle of yakult. ((:
IM SO BOREDD!
didnt go ferr art class and dance pratice tdayy.
lolxx.
overslept laa.
heh.


um. so bored cann?
art art art!
that's gonna be in ma head fereeverr!
=.=......................


before i sleep andd after i wake up
and all the hours in between
you're always in ma mind.
so ,every moment of the dayy eu are in ma thoughts.
i miss yooooo! :DD

yawnnsss

im home!
im beatt. *yawnns.
went t school ferr extra art lesson.


went t town.
met dez at orchard control.
lolx.
she waited ferr 50MINS!
srry darling. ((x
went t many places.
lolx.
ate lunch at NYDC.
um. den t cine.
bought maself a tee.
yeaa.
im too lazy t blog laa.
oh ya! we took neos!
((:


smth happen t ma darlingg.
aww.
i want good news.
tskk. )):


when it rains it reminds me of eu.
although 2000 miles awayy is so far,
i still always walk outside in the rain and kiss it.

...

didnt work todayy.
and im not gonna workk anymoree.
shit.


alrights , i hate today!
was packing ma room.
finally got ma own room.
heh.
i dont have the mood now.
yaa.
EU!
fuck off!
ahh! wadEVA!
eu suck big timeeee. (((: